Rules of the Road: Part Deux

Paul, everything you’ve said is correct.  However, there are a couple more rules you need to observe during a road-trip in order to make sure things run smoothly.

5.  It’s a Team effort

While Paul has an eternal doctor’s note relieving him of any driving duties on the expressway, he makes up for it by being the full-time navigator.  That means that everyone else should take their turn driving, so that others may rest.  Just as others have paid their share of the house, the same goes for driving duties.  Occasionally you’ll have a wanker that will refuse to do any driving, saying they're too tired, but how much sleep do you need on a bloody 21 hour car ride?

And the same goes for food stops.  We’re not going to make exceptions for everyone, because then we’d end up stopping every half hour for a while.  And if you know you're going to be on the road for a while, pick some food up before you begin your journey.  You don't need to be stopping five minutes into the drive to pick up a breakfast burrito.

6.  Keep Phone Calls to a minimum

I understand that when you first get on the road, you get all giddy and want to share it with the world, but it’s not really necessary to talk for more than an hour.  First of all, it’s unfair to others in the car that have to turn down the radio and stop their conversations so they don’t interrupt yours.  Plus it takes away from the camaraderie that's experienced in long car rides.

7. The best road snacks are beef jerky, Combo's, and Mountain Dew.

Again, this is simply the truth and really needs no explanation.  However, twizzlers or pretzels are also great road snacks.

8. Communication

Communication is always important, and in extended car rides, it's especially key.  

In OBX Part 1, Colin had brought walkie-talkies and those were pretty neat to have and helped with communication between cars.  Of course, that's when we still believed in caravanning, but still, they were fun to have and were a more immediate stream of communication rather than waiting for someone to respond to a text message or phone call.  So, if you're still going to caravan, against our advice, then get some walkie-talkies; they make the ride a little more fun.  (Warning: if some car in your area is somehow on the same channel as you, don't be a dick and prank call them over the walkie-talkie, or pretend to be part of their conversation, that's just a douche move.  Just switch channels.)

Going back to one of my other points, that driving is a team effort and everyone should do their part, if you're the driver, and you're getting tired because you've been driving for 5 or 6 straight hours, then say something.  It's stupid to keep driving if you can't keep your eyes open.  Let someone else take their turn.

And of course, if you need to tinkle or drop a deuce, say something to the driver.  No one needs to be refilling mountain dew bottles or stinking up the back seat.  

I believe that will do it for now.  Throw another one up there Paul.  Madjoff.